I can’t sleep. My mind is racing & I just plain don’t feel tired. Not sure if it’s just stress or the fact that I drank two glasses of sweet tea at chick-fil-a this evening (I don’t do caffeine or sugar very often, so the combo at night was probably dumb). Anyhow, I did all the quiet chores I could do and have been whiling my time away catching up on blog reading. Figured I’d go ahead & contribute to my own while I was at it.

A VCU student fwded me this article by John Piper on the problem of “Adultolescents“. Amazing. Please go read it.

As a couple who married at 21 & 22yrs old while still very much full-time college students, Ryan & I both have a soapbox about the notion of having to wait until you’re “mature” to marry. Marriage has been a primary conduit of maturation for us both. I would go so far as to say for many people it could be an unnecessary postponement of marriage that leaves many 30-somethings stuck in a 20-something mentality. Obviously there are legitimate reasons to postpone, but I do think our culture has needlessly caused an aversion to commitment & “growing up”. I don’t think everyone should marry at 20. I also don’t think we should freak out when people do.

Suck it up folks. You will not and cannot be 21 forever. How about instead of idolizing youth we enjoy EVERY stage of our lives that God has seen fit to grant us in the correct context?

4 thoughts on “Adultolescents

  1. ahhhhhhh you used the “c” worddddddd

    i dont think our culture knows what that means anymore. personally i think thats my aversion. we love someone one day, go out with them for year/s.. and then the next we don’t. i suppose with that type of lifestyle how do you know who you really love? i guess at that point it doesnt matter- its really all about commitment… and well we leave jobs when we get tired, (you could probably apply this to most any part of a person’s life) but oh that “c” word… its just very daunting ;)- and for those who aren’t married- I don’t think we even begint to understand it. :)

  2. oh, and also, lastly- i don’t think that should deter anyone from trying [to understand it] :-p

  3. :) yeah, pretty sure that’s a whole different soap box. we also confuse love with physical attraction. I’ll have to save that for another day as I don’t want to rant on the comment section for 2 pages. But I will say that’s one reason I can’t possibly imagine being married w/o Christ as the reason for both parties living. My security in my marriage doesn’t come from the fact that I know ryan has “love feelings” toward me, but that He loves Christ & made a commitment to love me (feelings & all) really it’s Jesus I trust. That’s my security. If I were trusting a man to stay with me, I would be a nervous wreck. Not only b/c he’s flawed, but good lord…I couldn’t ask a human to know me as well as Ryan does & continue to “love” me for more than 6 months (about the time it takes for physical attraction to lose the “newness” excitement imo). Not to mention the fact that before I was a christian I was notorious for breaking up with guys during PMS. A week later I’d realize all those things I “hated” about them…weren’t that bad. Talk about an unstable relationship. ;)

    It IS scary at first & i think perhaps it’s one of those things you have to learn on the fly. As you go. Trusting God above all else.

  4. We married young too (I was 21 and he was 20), and I absolutely LOVE your soapbox! We get on it ourselves quite often. It amazes me how afraid people are of growing up. I LOVE growing up! Embrace it, enjoy it, glorify God in it! :o) Thanks for the reminder, Jen, and thanks for the article. This one’s a keeper.